To New Beginnings


Growing up sucks and so does reality

Which is why I decided to write an open letter to everyone who are feeling the same way in here, a blog in which I have decided to reactivate.

I must say this year has been the worst yet best lesson I’ve ever had. I had a huge mental break down since day one of 2017, throughout the next couple of months I failed at studying, maintaining work, managing times with family, relationships, long story short everything seemed to be falling apart and it kept getting worse. 

One night I couldn’t stop crying and it really hit me when one phone call came and some truths about the things I’ve been trying to figure out came up. That was the time, that was the second when I finally decided to stop,

Stop crying
Stop overthinking
Stop being so dramatic about everything
Stop apologizing too much 
Stop being lazy
Stop whining
And stop thinking that it has always been my fault that everybody around me gets hurt

I went to a short getaway and managed to have my day 1 to restart everything, slowly I’m recovering and slowly I’m learning to accept that it’s okay to put myself first before others and that it’s okay not to be okay. I’m learning that life is not always about good and bad, it’s not always about proofing other people wrong or right.

So I am writing this with the hope that to whoever is reading this right now, the one’s who knows or doesn’t’ know me, that you would just stop for awhile, look at the world around you and think. Have you been living in the right environment? Have you been getting what you really deserve? How many hours have you spent crying for you have been cheated on and blaming yourself that it’s your fault for not being good enough? How many hours have you spent being so down for thinking that you are not smart or great enough for that you haven’t even try that much to achieve your goals?

How many hours have you spent choosing to accept lies, just for temporary happiness?

For whoever is reading this out there, I hope you are capable of making choices, not for who you wish to become today, but for what kind of life would you wish to be settling in 10, 20 or even 30 years from now. 

P.S: I am currently living an okay life and I’m totally okay with it, I hope you’re all doing better than me right now! :-)


- AG


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